Gay Marriage:Marry Me - At Least A Little

As the first gay couple in Germany, Heinz-Friedrich Harre and Reinhard Lüschow sealed the marriage-like union on August 1, 2001 in the registry office in Hanover. The civil partnership law makes it possible. A stage victory on the way to "marriage for all".

by Yasmin Sibus

On that Wednesday at 8.20 a.m. penetrated through the windows of the old town hall in the city center of Hanover excited, happy voices. Corks pop out of champagne bottles. In one of the wedding rooms, two men fulfill a heart's desire. Heinz-Friedrich Harre and Reinhard Lüschow "marry", at least a little bit. Thanks to the civil partnership law that has been in force since midnight, they can make their love official for the first time. Most call the connection "gay marriage", some "small marriage" or "partnership", officially the union is called a registered partnership.

Pioneers become part of German queer history

When 48-year-old Harre and 40-year-old Lüschow leave the registry office, they step through a rainbow of colorful balloons after the heavy, double-leaf wooden door. Male cheerleaders holding orange and purple pom-poms line their way, behind which cameramen and photographers await the couple. Friends, family and curious people cheer for the two. On this morning of August 1, 2001, Harre and Lüschow become part of German - and especially queer - history. They are the first male couple to dare that day.

Just a little later, at 9 a.m., Gudrun Pannier and Angelika Baldow are the first female couple to tie the knot in Berlin. How many homosexual lovers "marry" on this day is not recorded centrally. The "taz" reports about 100 lesbian and gay couples.

Joint struggle for equal rights with heterosexuals

Heinz-Friedrich Harre and Reinhard Lüschow fought for many years until their "little marriage" to have their sexual orientation and their relationship seen and recognized. They have been a couple since the late 1980s and have lived together since 1991. It is becoming more and more clear to the administrative employee Harre and the tax officer Lüschow that as same-sex couples they have many disadvantages compared to married heterosexual couples. Among other things, they have no right to information or visits in the hospital and massive tax disadvantages. The two men do not want to accept this and are involved, among other things, in the federal working group for gay and lesbian couples. In addition, they take part in media campaigns and do not shy away from legal disputes to point out that their and other non-heterosexual relationships are discriminated against.

Criminal homosexuality:Paragraph 175 exists until 1994

When the two are born, homosexuality is punishable in both West and East Germany. Paragraph 175, which dates back to the days of the Kaiser, was only relaxed in the Federal Republic in 1969, the counterpart in the German Democratic Republic a year earlier. It will only be deleted after reunification in 1994.

This does not mean that non-heterosexual people have equal rights. Two men or women who may have been in a relationship and shared an apartment for decades have no rights in the event of death - neither at the funeral nor at the inheritance. The list of inequalities goes on and on. Some homosexuals therefore adopt their partners in order to be able to offer a little security.

Paragraph 175

• Section 175 of the German Criminal Code existed from January 1, 1872 to June 11, 1994. It criminalized sexual acts between men.
• In 1935 the National Socialists tightened the paragraph. They increased the maximum sentence from six months to five years in prison. In serious cases, the penalty was even up to ten years in prison (§ 175a).
• For two decades, the Federal Republic of Germany stuck to the version of § 175 from the National Socialist era.
• In 1969 there was a first and in 1973 a second reform of the paragraph.
• It was only repealed in 1994. A total of around 140,000 men were convicted under Section 175, 50,000 of them after 1949.

Denmark is the first country to open

During the 1980s, criticism of discrimination against same-sex couples grew louder. When Denmark was the first country in the world to introduce registered civil partnerships in 1989, a year later the then Gay Association in Germany (SVD) - today the Lesbian and Gay Association of Germany - also demanded the right to a so-called civil marriage. Together with the Federal Association of Gay Lawyers (BASJ), the association is developing a draft law. But by no means all homosexuals are behind it. In the eyes of the critics, marriage is an outdated and idealized concept that should be abolished. It is inconceivable to them that people demand exactly this for themselves.

"Action at the registry office":250 couples order the contingent

On August 19, 1992, the SVD substantiated its claim with the "Action Registry Office". On this day, around 250 homosexual couples order the contingent in their local registry offices - among them are Harre and Lüschow from Hanover. The most prominent - now separated - couple of the campaign are the comedian Hella von Sinnen and the author Cornelia Scheel. The common goal is to fight for approval after the foreseeable rejection by the authorities - if necessary before the Federal Constitutional Court (BVerfG). The media response is great. Local and national newspapers such as the news magazine "Der Spiegel" and the daily newspaper "taz" report on it. The next day the latter headlines:"Homos storm the registry offices" - and shows a photo of Harre and Lüschow.

Constitutional judges reject lawsuits, but leave the door open

Like many others, the couple is suing against the expected rejection by the registry office. They all fail in court - some in the first instance, the next in the second or at the latest in the last instance. In its judgment of October 4, 1993, the Federal Constitutional Court argued that marriage in the constitutional sense is a life partnership between a man and a woman. In order to change that, there would have to be "sufficient evidence for a fundamental change in the understanding of marriage in the sense that gender differences would no longer have any formative significance". The SVD sees an opportunity in this. He now has a clear goal:to actively bring about this change.

Greens drive legislation

Politically, non-heterosexual couples experience the most support from the Greens, formed in 1980. In particular, Volker Beck, who was openly gay from the outset, is committed to ending discrimination, among other things as a gay advisor in the Bundestag faction and later as a member of parliament. He works on bills on civil marriage for same-sex couples and continues to advance the issue with his parliamentary group. In November 2000, it brought the civil partnership law, LPartG for short, to the vote in the first red-green federal government. The coalition can push through a part, and adjustments to tax law, for example, fail due to resistance from the CDU. Federal President Johannes Rau signs the law on February 16, 2001.

CDU-led countries want to stop the LPartG with an urgent application

Just a few days before it comes into force in August, the planned dates in the registry offices - including those of Harre and Lüschow - are on the brink. The reason is an urgent application by the union-led federal states of Bavaria and Saxony against the new law. According to the state governments, there should be no legal form similar to marriage. The Federal Constitutional Court smashes the lawsuit - with 5:3 votes. The civil partnership is "so something different than marriage and therefore no danger for the same." In addition, it is "constitutionally not justifiable to deduce from the special protection of marriage that such other partnerships are to be designed at a distance from marriage and are to be provided with fewer rights."

Registered partnership:Harre and Lüschow want more

When Heinz-Friedrich Harre and Reinhard Lüschow left the wedding room as planned on the morning of August 1, they were beaming. "It's a wonderful feeling," Harre replies when asked how he's doing. As much as the two enjoy this moment, they are also certain:"For us it's just a first step," says Lüschow. Their goal remains the opening of civil marriage - and equality. Because from the point of view of those affected, the civil partnership law is at best a concession:homosexual couples can now oblige each other to pay maintenance with their vows, share a family name and form communities of gain. For tax purposes, however, they are still considered single, and they are also not allowed to adopt children together.

BVerfG sees partnership and marriage as equal in 2009

In the years that followed, the Civil Partnership Act was amended several times. Couples sue against individual discriminatory aspects, all of which the Federal Constitutional Court does not allow. The turning point came in 2009:to date, the court has justified its decisions on the basis of the difference between marriage and civil partnership. However, in a decision dated July 7, it now states that both are "long-term, solidified forms of partnership". Equal treatment of both is henceforth not only permitted, but required. Homosexuals living in a registered partnership have the same rights as married couples.

The question of conscience:Bundestag approves "Marriage for All" in 2017

2017 will be the year in which, within a few days, what has always seemed unthinkable becomes possible. "Marriage for all" is cast in law. With a view to the general election, the SPD, Greens and FDP are making marriage a condition for potential coalition partners. Chancellor Angela Merkel (CDU) then declared a vote on same-sex marriage to be a question of conscience at the end of June - and thus released the MPs from the pressure to form a group. You don't have to follow party lines, you can decide freely. With 393 yes votes to 226 no votes, four abstentions and seven votes not cast due to absence, the law achieved the required majority on June 30. In the Bundestag, colorful confetti flies over the pioneer Volker Beck in the seats of the Greens parliamentary group. After almost 30 years, he achieves his most important goal on his last day in Parliament. For him it means "a bit of social peace", as he said after the meeting in an interview with the television station phoenix.

Lüschow:"Now we are finally equal"

For the now 64-year-old Harre and the 57-year-old Lüschow, the dream is finally coming true. And so they also want to be among the first to have their civil partnership converted into a marriage. Again they get one of the first appointments in the registry office and get married on October 1, 2017. "Now we are finally equal and no longer a second-class couple," says Lüschow. "We are very happy". The seriously ill Harre thanks his doctors and nurses for keeping him fit for so long:"That I can experience that!" Four weeks after the wedding - and honeymoon on Norderney - Heinz-Friedrich Harre died peacefully at home with his great love.

Open demands for "marriage for all"

In 2017, the Bundestag largely ended discrimination against non-heterosexual couples with "Marriage for All". However, the law does not initially clarify what applies to neither female nor male people. Here, the Federal Constitutional Court made it clear with a judgment on the third gender that people of any gender may marry each other. In particular, questions about parenthood in so-called rainbow families have not been clarified in the interests of those affected:

• For non-heterosexual couples, the name of the birthing mother is entered on the birth certificate, but the name of the co-mother is not. It is recognized with all rights and obligations only through step-child adoption.
• If a gay and a lesbian couple want to be parents together, only two of them can be mentioned on the birth certificate. More than two parents are not allowed.
• Gay men in Germany cannot have a child with the help of a surrogate mother. In the case of surrogacy abroad, a local court must first confirm your parenthood. These documents must then be recognized by a German family court.