A promising doctor and her handsome husband are raising lovely twins. They have known each other almost since childhood. They married early, survived the war together, and managed to reconcile work and family life. Sounds like an idyll? Nothing unusual. This is not all true.
What to do when a beloved, admired husband has enormous sexual needs and the wife (after a bad first experience) is unable to meet them? There is nothing else but to invite a more sensual friend to this arrangement. This is what the famous Michalina Wisłocka, the author of the famous "The Art of Loving", did. Years before she wrote down the most famous Polish textbook on sexology, she initiated an arrangement that is surprising even in the progressive 21st century.
Wisłocka met her future husband when she was only 12 years old. Stanisław Wuttke was four years older. Back then, when she was still a girl, she might not have noticed that the boy was crossing certain boundaries. From the very beginning of their relationship, despite the age difference between them, he primarily aimed at physical contact. He wanted to kiss Misię on the first "date", which took place under the guardianship of his parents behind the wall. He was impatient that the girl wasn't ready for anything else, but since she was staring at him as in a picture, he decided to wait a bit.
Michalina Wisłocka met her future husband very early. In the photo he is already a mature woman (photo:Mateusz Opasiński; license CC BY-SA 3.0).
Fake wedding, real wedding night
In the summer of 1939, the young people swore their love and exchanged wedding rings. It was their private ceremony, with no witnesses. However, it was enough for Stach to finally manage to lead to his wedding night. There was no question of pleasure on the part of the "bride", and the experience of that first time for years cemented her belief that sex was more pain than pleasure.
On September 13, the proper wedding took place, hastily organized, almost literally under bombs. At the time, 18-year-old Michalina imagined this special day in a completely different way. Like every young lady in love, she planned an elegant party and honeymoon. Unfortunately, the young people began their adult life in the reality of war, so they could only dream of luxuries and luxuries.
Stach took advantage of the opportunities that his married life had opened up for him from the very beginning. And he used it so much that Misia had to see a doctor for a special rubbing ointment. It didn't help much, because the freshly baked daffodil had no plans to change his habits. From the beginning, he was a despot not only in bed, but also in everyday life. He cut Wisłocka away from his relatives, he categorically ordered her to learn from textbooks of his choice and checked her progress. It was impressing to some extent, but also very overwhelming.
Because it takes three to tango
Perhaps it was then that the thought of introducing Wanda into the marriage - the best friend from whom Stach had effectively separated her - sprouted in the mind of the future doctor. Before, girls were inseparable, so why shouldn't it be so now? It is certain that it was Wisłocka who initiated the addition of a third person to the marital herd. In the book "Wisłocka, or how it was with the art of love" Konrad Szołajski quotes a fragment of her diaries that tells about it:
(...) I remembered my dream of a triangle. This concept was born in my head after reading the Japanese novel entitled The History of the Lute. There was a great scholar and two of his wives who adored him immeasurably. I thought it would be lovely to create such a triangle in our lives ... Stach liked Wanda and was attracted to the originality of this concept.
(...) I loved Stach very much, but my relationship with Wanda was so deep that I was inclined to share my husband without thinking , bestow some part of it. In a friendship like ours - jealousy will not exist.
Stanisław was a despot from the very beginning. Illustrative illustration (source:public domain).
It quickly turned out that the man was attracted not so much by the originality of the concept, but by the fact that he would finally be able to have sex according to his needs, i.e. every hour. Jealousy also appeared almost immediately, and Michalina felt sidelined. When, after a few weeks, she returned from the hospital where she was treated for typhus, she saw that her husband and friend (affectionately called Dziula) had already created their own world.
Despite everything, the system worked for many years, women complemented each other to some extent. Michalina has always been a type of scientist, she did not care about mundane matters such as sexy looks, cleaning or cooking. Wanda was her complete opposite. The men looked after her, she knew how to bustle in the kitchen and keep things tidy.
It was she who also took on almost the entire burden of bed duties. Except for one moment when something happened in Wisłocka. It was then that she had sex with her husband all night, full of determination and passion. All three of them were convinced that Stach (called Ciapek by his women) "shoots blinders", so at least there was no need to worry about the protection.
Model family 3 + 2
Stanisław was definitely not a domestic man, the most important thing for him was his education and career plans, so when he found out that he had both his women pregnant almost simultaneously, he did not like it, to put it mildly. To hide their condition, Michalina and Wanda left for the countryside. Due to complications, the former gave birth to a daughter in the hospital, the son of the latter was born at home. The documents stated that Krysia's mother is Wisłocka, and Krzysia was born by her closest friend.
In this arrangement, Stanisław, Michalina and Wanda, the latter took on almost the entire burden of bed duties. Illustrative illustration (source:public domain).
The children returned home as twins - legally conceived in the marriage of the Wisłocki family (in post-war times, Stanisław did not want to be called Wuttke anymore). And this is how they were brought up, they believed that they were the children of Michalina and Stach. As the couple was still studying and rarely visited the house, Wanda took on most of the chores.
I only feel sorry for the kids
Wisłocka, her husband and best friend could live in this unusual arrangement without being disturbed by anyone for years. This is because after the war all kinds of "additional quarters" could be explained by housing reasons. There was not enough flats, and young people had to go somewhere. What was easy to hide from other family and friends did not escape the careful attention of Krysia and Krzys. They officially learned the truth much later, but the tension in this atypical family has always been felt.
Wisłocka's daughter, Krystyna Bielewicz, told her years later that she actually did not remember anything good from her childhood, but only situations that had "hit" her. Wanda treated her much worse than her biological son. The parents were never at home, and when Krysia managed to see her father, it was usually in the company of some women. Stach could not, despite having two "wives", give up jumping to the side. The girl was much closer to her mother, but she was often absent, because she devoted herself to a scientific career.
Dziula, called Cipcia, is leaving
While Michalina resisted the fact that her husband slept with a whole lot of lover (thanks to which she did not have to fulfill her marriage duties), Wanda did not want to accept it. It bothered her that she was not her official wife, and that Stach was accompanied by other ladies on vacation. Finally, she announced that she was leaving. The man promised her a marriage, a divorce from Wisłocka, and claimed that he really cared. On leaving, Wanda passed on the offer to her friend. This is how the scene was described in his book "Wisłocka, or how it was with the art of love" Konrad Szołajski:
- I'm getting away from you, you can have it for yourself, just like you always wanted. Although if I were you, I'd throw him too, because he's a lying motherfucker and hooker , just here on my knees he was proposing marriage.
And that was the reason for the end of Wisłocka's greatest love. The doctor was not jealous at all for sex, very much for love and attention. The breakup led her to a serious heart disease, which should probably be considered as a confirmation of the thesis that unhappy love can actually break the heart.
Of course, the children came out the worst of the relationship between Michalina, Wanda and Stanisław (source:public domain).
At the breakup, as it usually happens, the children turned out to be the worst. After the father's final departure, the "twins" lived with Wisłocka for some time, then Wanda took Krzys to her home. One day, in an argument, she shouted at him that she was his mother, which left the boy traumatized for life. Krysia took everything better. As she later explained, she experienced the changes less because she was not related to her father. It was she who took care of her stepbrother after he suffered a stroke. Anyway, his life was very unhappy.
There is no bad thing…
After the breakup, Wisłocka could devote herself to scientific work and to men who treated her better than her first partner. However, she did not dazzle with these relationships the way her husband used to be lovers. Unfortunately, she did not find love. Quoting Konrad Szołajski:
(...) Michalina was a fan of admirers - after divorcing Stach, she did not bond with anyone for a long time and she never found a real feeling (...) herself. The matter of choosing the perfect partner was made difficult by the fact that it required a certain level of amateurs:after a traumatic, but mentally stimulating relationship with Staś, she was convinced that a man must be intellectually developed.
However, she learned in practice the art of loving, which she talked about in the office with her patients. It was there, and while traveling around Poland with lectures, that she collected materials for her book over the years. When confronted by young women, she tried to tell them that they shouldn't accept whatever their partner expects from them against themselves. That they can get real pleasure from sex, which does not have to end with pregnancy. So she told them exactly what she herself did not know at their age.
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